Thursday, March 23, 2006

22 Days Of WrestleMania (Top 10 Worst Matches)

WrestleMania is definitely the pinnacle of the wrestling business. However, through the years, us fans have had to sit through some pathetic matches. Sometimes you can't help but wonder how some of these guys even made it as far in the business as they have. These are the 10 worst matches I've seen in the 21 WrestleMania events. (Prediction: Mark Henry vs. Undertaker may join these ranks after this years 'Mania.)

(Note: Big Show vs. Akebono did not make the cut because it was not a wrestling match.)

10. Undertaker vs. King Kong Bundy (WrestleMania XI)
King Kong Bundy surprisingly put on a decent match at WrestleMania 2 against the Hulkster, but that was 9 years before this. Trust me, age has not done Bundy well. Not to mention this is one of the worst feuds I can remember. You figured that the fake Undertaker gimmick would have killed the whole feud, but nope, they somehow thought King Kong Bundy and 'Taker would draw them some big bucks. 11 years later, I think it's pretty safe to say they were way off.

9. Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar (WrestleMania XX)
This contest may be the strangest in WrestleMania history. On paper, it actually had a little bit of potential. However, both men were on their way out and the fans in attendance knew it. This led to what seem to be hours of both men just standing at the ring trying not to be embarassed for themselves. Even special guest referee Steve Austin could hardly stay awake during this one.

8. Jake "The Snake" Roberts vs. Andre The Giant (WrestleMania V)
Now for the record, I do like both of these guys (not necessarily as wrestlers). Both are legends in the industry. Both have their own DVDs. But let's face it, Andre really wasn't capable of a good match, especially in 1989. I can't say Roberts was in top form either, because in order to have a bad match, both participants really need to be off. Trust me when I say this is a dud.

7. Al Snow And Steve Blackman vs. T & A (WrestleMania 2000)
Being the Al Snow fan that I am, this is a bit of a shocker. But if you witnessed this match, you'd most likely agree. This is one of the best examples of 4 competitors not clicking at all. Al Snow should use this at his wrestling school on what happens when you wrestle guys with no talent. On a side note, Test just got re-signed by WWE. Brilliant.

6. Demolition vs. Tenryu And Kitao (WrestleMania VII)
This match wasn't just horrible, it also made no sense. Yes, I understand Demolition was on their way down, but what is the point of bringing in guys from Japan for one match. I'm not really familiar with either guys' work, but this certainly didn't impress me much. Stupid, stupid match.

5. Terri vs. The Kat (WrestleMania 2000)
Oddly enough the only one-on-one matchup at WrestleMania 2000 was this one. A match featuring two of the WWE's divas who were not actually wrestlers. I usually go lighter on the women's matches, but this one was just plain old stupid. However, this isn't even the worst women's match in history. One topped them all. I'll get to that shortly though.

4. Undertaker vs. Big Boss Man (WrestleMania XV)
Another one of those matches you can't help but wonder about. Who in their right mind thought that Big Boss Man was going to defeat Undertaker? Let alone in a Hell in a Cell match. Let's just say if they make a best of Hell in a Cell DVD, this won't make the cut. And just when you thought the match was bad enough, Undertaker goes on to "hang" the Boss Man. Ugh.

3. Sable vs. Tori (WrestleMania XV)
Wow, two WrestleMania XV matches in a row. That can't be good. Without question one of the most pitiful women's matches ever. I'm not even sure why they had a women's division at the time. To make things worse, this led to the debut of Nicole Bass (that "thing" best known for their fame from Howard Stern). I highly recommend you stay as far away from this match as you possibly can.

2. Hulk Hogan vs. Yokozuna (WrestleMania IX)
This is the absolute worst moment in WrestleMania history. Hulk Hogan is a terrible wrestler. There I said it. He punches. He kicks. He clotheslines. We get it already! Very few matches involving Hogan are even decent, but this one is even worse. Hogan just had to get himself (and his ego) into the main event somehow. So the brilliant idea is you have the young star (Bret Hart) job to the fat guy who can't wrestle (Yokozuna) so that the egomaniac (Hogan) can come to the aid of the young star. Then the big fat guy who can't wrestle challenges the egomaniac to a match. The egomaniac can beat the big fat guy who can't wrestle in under a minute, making the young star look like a jobber. Great logic.

1. Undertaker vs. Giant Gonzales (WrestleMania IX)
As bad as that last match was, at least it was short. This match featuring the Undertaker (who made the list 3 times) in another horrible angle, this time against Harvey Whippleman. Smell the buyrate! I once met Giant Gonzales and I must say he was as unfriendly of a person as he was bad at wrestling. He was a total jerk. I guess that explains why he was sitting all by himself. He is possibly the worst wrestler I have ever seen and if one man is going to have a watchable match with him, it sure as heck is not going to be Undertaker. Did I mention that WrestleMania IX is by far the worst one ever? Yes even for those who watched it live at the age of 10, it still sucked!

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